The Solutionator

Barack Hussein "The Solutionator" Obama has proposed some rather radical solutions to the crises facing America since he thrust himself onto the national stage.

Crisis 1: The country, nay the world, was paying record high oil prices due to unprescedented demand.

Solutionator says: getting tune ups and filling our tires would save more oil that we would get from drilling.

Crisis 2: Easy credit and government mandated monetary policies push the
economy over the cliff.

Solutionator says: we need to borrow more money, really fast, and don't worry about how we spend it because it is the only thing that will save the economy. He later borrowed even more money saying that it will create or save millions of jobs without offering specifics of how he counts "saved" jobs.

Crisis 3: potential global pandemic caused by a revival of the swine flu in a country adjacent to ours with a porous border.

Solutionator says: wash your hands when you shake hands and.cover your mouth
when you cough.